1. Get excited

You have more options and thus more opportunities than ever before. This also means that you will have more choices to make. Take responsibility and get excited about the choices you will make now as they will determine your level of success and personal satisfaction in the future. Conversely, if you feel that you are "making do" or just settling for something, you can expect more of the same and set yourself up for possible failure.

2. Why versus how

One of the main reasons people fail in following through on their resolutions is because they have not developed enough compelling reasons why they should change. Once you are clear about what you want, whether it is a personal goal or business objective, create a strong "emotional awareness" for yourself. This means that you have to go beyond your thoughts and carry it over to your emotions. Fall in love with the process of reaching your goals.

3. Associate with the right people

Look for family, friends or co-workers who believe in you and support you. Seek the assistance from a personal coach who can give you the learning, strategies, motivation and accountability to achieve your goals.

4. Sweat the small stuff

Henry Ford once said that if you break a big job into small parts it will become easy. Ask yourself what activities are necessary each day and every week to move you in the direction of your goals.

5. Choose feedback versus failure

Many people don’t set goals because they are afraid they might fail. Remember that failure is a concept that only exists in your mind. When you don’t get immediate results, you have not failed, but you have only  produced a certain result. So whatever the results are, consider it feedback and not failure. Ask yourself:"What can I learn from the result I produced?" It is within the answer to this question that you will discover new opportunities and learn better ways of creating the results you seek. At all times remain flexible.

6. What you focus on expands

Focus on what reaching your goal will mean to you, your family, friends or colleagues. Create a mental picture in your mind of the new and improved you and let go of the limiting beliefs and thoughts of your current situation. When you focus on what you don’t have (yet) or focus on the voids in your life, you will only get more of it.

7. Teamwork makes the dream work

When you set goals, think how others will benefit as well. Selfish goals have little merit. Success in any endeavor can only be achieved with and through others.

Compelling goals will give you the ability to grow and stay focused in times of social and economic change. Goals will not only pull you in the direction where you want to go, but also influence the activities you get involved in and the people you meet along the way.  You will find that the path you take, the direction you choose is what is most rewarding. It’s not so much what you will get when you reach your destination or achieve your goal, it’s the person you will become when you get there that defines you for yourself and others.

To your success in 2009!

As you enter the New Year, I invite you to take a step back and look at your life as it is today, get a sense of where you are going and where your priorities lie. 

The following ten life coaching questions will help keep you on track moving forward. They will help you to refocus in those moments when you feel uncertain about what you’re doing and why. They will provide guidance, direction and support when you feel that certain events are controlling you.

Some of these powerful questions can produce that ‘breakthrough moment’ when you understand a situation more clearly from a new or different perspective. Other questions invite introspection and will lead to a greater self awareness, more creativity, additional solutions and new insights.

Question # 10: "How am I spending my time?"
How you choose to spend your time is how you spend your life. How can you manage yourself more effectively allowing you to spend more time in those areas that are most important in your life? What choices will you make? [Read More]

Question # 9: "What Would I Do If I Knew I Couldn't Fail?"
The only way to create results in your life is by taking action. Realize that, succeed or fail, you will produce results from which you will learn. Don’t be afraid of failure; be afraid of not taking action! [Read more]

Question # 8: "Who Am I becoming?"
How satisfied are you with the person you are becoming? What kind of person do you see yourself becoming in the New Year? If you want to have more and experience more in life, you have to become more. [Read more]

Question # 7: "What Am I Tolerating?"
What have you been tolerating at work, at home or in your social environment in the past year? What are the things you wish would resolve themselves somehow? Here are some life coaching tips to help you eliminate the things that you no longer want in your life. [Read more]

Question # 6: "Where Do I Focus My Attention?"
Your mind cannot tell the difference between something you think about or focus on that you do want, and the stuff you think about that you don’t want. Your mind is a very effective goal seeking mechanism and seeks to create precisely what you focus on. The key is to direct your focus on the goals and experiences that you do want in your life. [Read more]

Question # 5: "How Am I Using My Talents?
When you talk with people who have achieved a high level of success in their lives, you’ll find that they have found ways to incorporate their passions and talents into their daily activities. They also experience more fulfillment and balance because they intentionally played to their talents. Do you know what your talents are? How do you go about discovering some of your talents or natural abilities? [Read more]

Question # 4: "Who Do I spend My Time With?
The people you spend most of your time with have a strong influence on you. When you are surrounded by negative or angry people, you will absorb some of their negativity or anger. When you spend time with people who inspire you, support you and believe in you, their positive energy will boost your motivation, self-confidence and inner strength.[Read more]

Question # 3: "How Do I Honor My Core Values?"
Your core values express the essence of who you are. Although you may share similar values with others, you have a unique set of values. Many of the important decisions that you make, and the actions you take, are based on the values that you hold. Your values, together with the beliefs that support them, are an energetic driving force and provide meaning and direction in your life.[Read more]

Question # 2: "What Do I Want?"
Think of yourself as the majority shareholder in your life. What are some of the strategic decisions that will help you grow and flourish in the New Year? What will you vote "yes" for in your life? What will you vote "no" for? Choose, decide, take action, and make 2009 your best year ever! [Read more]

Question # 1: "How Am I Committed?"
Why is it that we tell ourselves we want certain things but we don’t take action? We might have the best of intentions to make certain changes in our lives, yet we do not follow through on our resolutions? Does that mean we are lazy or undisciplined? Are we afraid of failure? Are we holding on to limiting beliefs about ourselves? We get frustrated when we think and say we are committed to wanting something for ourselves, but no action follows that voice of commitment. [Read more]

Question # 2: "What Do I Want?"

The quality of your life's experiences amounts to the sum of all the decisions you have ever made.
The power to make decisions is what gives you freedom. The more freedom you have, the more options you can entertain. The more options you have available, the more opportunities you can create for yourself and others.

Have you ever been told what to believe? Have you ever had someone tell you what you should do, how you should feel or behave? Why would you have someone else decide for you in your life? What is the cost of living that way? Life is short, and time is your most valuable resource. Letting anyone else decide for you is a waste of time! No one else knows you as well as you do. You are the expert of your own life.

Think of yourself as the majority shareholder in your life. What are some of the strategic decisions that will help you grow and flourish in the New Year? What will you vote "yes" for in your life? What will you vote "no" for? Recognizing that you have a choice does not mean that there will never be any uncomfortable consequences. But not making a decision is also a decision which could have consequences that are just as negative.

Peter Drucker once said that whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision! In what department of your life's organization - relationships, money, health, fun, recreation, personal growth - do you currently experience the most challenge? Where do you feel trapped?

Whatever you believe is missing, it is yours, waiting to be claimed. The first step is to make a conscious decision about the things you would like to have more of and the things you will need to let go off.

Some people get trapped in inaction. They have a hard time saying yes, because that would mean that they have to close off other possibilities. In economics, this is referred to as the 'opportunity cost'. The same principle is true in life. Saying yes to one thing often means saying no to many other possibilities.

Don't just dwell in possibility. Dwell in reality!

Choose, decide, take action, and make 2009 your best year ever!

"Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it.
Establish your priorities and go to work."  (H.L. Hunt)

Question # 10: "How am I spending my time?"
Question # 9: "What Would I Do If I Knew I Couldn’t Fail?"
Question # 8: "Who Am I becoming?"
Question # 7: "What Am I Tolerating?"
Question # 6: "Where Do I Focus My Attention?"
Question # 5: "How Am I Using My Talents?
Question # 4: "Who Do I spend My Time With?
Question # 3: "How Do I Honor My Core Values?"

Life and carreer coach based in St Louis

Question # 4: "Who Do I Spend My Time With?

The people you spend most of your time with have a strong influence on you. When you are surrounded by negative or angry people, you will absorb some of their negativity or anger. When you spend time with people who inspire you, support you and believe in you, their positive energy will boost your motivation, self-confidence and inner strength. 

Do not underestimate the power of influence of the people you surround yourself with.
Make a mental note of the people in your personal and professional life with whom you most often associate and think of how they are influencing you, both positively and negatively.

Perhaps you've heard the story of the little bird. He had his wing over his eye and he was crying. The owl said to the bird, "You are crying." "Yes," said the little bird, and he pulled his wing away from his eye. "Oh, I see," said the owl. "You're crying because the big bird pecked out your eye." And the little bird said, "No, I'm not crying because the big bird pecked out my eye. I'm crying because I let him."

I believe that the quality of your life is greatly influenced by the quality of your associations and relationships. Be cautious of the people you allow yourself to associate with in your personal life and business.

Choose to surround yourself with people who will move you forward on your journey and let go of the negative influences that impede your progress.

Question # 10: "How am I spending my time?"

Question # 9: "What Would I Do If I Knew I Couldn’t Fail?"

Question # 8: "Who Am I becoming?"

Question # 7: "What Am I Tolerating?"

Question # 6: "Where Do I Focus My Attention?"

Question # 5: "How Am I Using My Talents?

Question # 5: "How Am I Using My Talents?

When you talk with people who have achieved a high level of success in their lives, you’ll find that they have found ways to incorporate their passions and talents into their daily activities. They also experience more fulfillment and balance because they intentionally played to their talents and strengths by developing the know-how and experience through continued focus and practice.

Your talents influence how you think and the way you respond to the situations in your life. Once you fully understand and acknowledge your natural abilities, you will develop a higher self awareness, which will lead to increased self confidence, a healthier self esteem, more success and personal satisfaction.

Talents by themselves are not that special, it is what you decide to do with them that make them special. All too often we deny our own talents, because to acknowledge them would mean we have to use them.

Why is it sometimes difficult to identify our own talents? First, it’s a question we don’t really ask ourselves. Second, our talents feel so natural to us that we tend to take them for granted. Third, we live in a culture where we tend to focus on improving our weaknesses rather than developing our talents into strengths.

Do you know what your talents are? How do you go about discovering some of your talents or natural abilities?

Answer the following questions and start to identify some of the common themes within your answers.

• What are some activities or special interests you enjoyed growing up? What did you enjoy most about those moments and why?
  
• What are some of the skills or abilities you developed over the years? What skills were easy for you to learn or develop?
  
• What are some of your favorite activities or projects that give you the most satisfaction?  At home? At work? What are some activities that whenever you’re doing them, everything just flows because it just feels right.  It comes natural to you and you tend to lose track of time. What are some activities that you genuinely look forward to doing again? (.. .watching American Idol is not one of them!)
  
• What would you enjoy doing even when you’re not getting paid for it?
  
• What do other people regularly ask you to do?
  
• What are some of the qualities that other people think you have?

Once you get a better understanding of your dominant innate talents and abilities, start looking for ways to incorporate them into your daily life. None of us have been dealt the perfect hand, but it is your responsibility and greatest joy to become the best you can with the cards you have been dealt.

Question # 10: "How am I spending my time?"

Question # 9: "What Would I Do If I Knew I Couldn’t Fail?"

Question # 8: "Who Am I becoming?"

Question # 7: "What Am I Tolerating?"

Question # 6: "Where Do I Focus My Attention?"

Question # 8: "Who Am I becoming?"

How satisfied are you with the person you are becoming? What kind of person do you see yourself becoming in the New Year? Do you see someone who is becoming more stressed out or tired with an unsatisfying job or an unbalanced work/home life, or do you see someone who is enjoying a happy and fulfilling lifestyle? How do you feel about your future self?

"If you want to have more and experience more in life, you have to become more."

What are some of the personal qualities you would like to further develop in the New Year?
Perhaps you would like to become more skillful or competent. More honest, sincere, genuine or congruent.  More compassionate, accepting, forgiving or grateful.  More creative or expressive.  More courageous.  More generous, loving or happy. More responsible.

No matter how you feel about yourself right now, you can make a decision to become more of who you really are. The power to choose lies within your mind and how you think about yourself. You will become what you think about, most of the time.

Your thinking process determines how you feel, the choices you make and the results you create.
If you seek to attract new experiences in your life or you want to make certain changes, you need to begin the process in your mind. Focus on continuous personal development; with books, CD’s, seminars, personal coaching, studying, listening, practicing, and nourishing your mind.

Become the mental architect of your own personal transformation!

Change your mind and change your life in 2009!

Question # 9: "What Would I Do If I Knew I Couldn’t Fail?"
Question # 10: "How am I spending my time?"

Question # 9: "What Would I Do If I Knew I Couldn’t Fail?"

What if failure was not an option? The fear of failure holds us back more than anything else in all our pursuits in life. Many people don’t even set goals because they are often so afraid of failing that they do not even try.

How many opportunities have you missed in the past because you lacked the courage to take a chance, to play full out, all because you were afraid you might fail? How much more pain and lost opportunities are you willing to endure by continuing to allow fear and procrastination to rule your life?

Failure is a concept that only exists in your ego’s mind. If your ego would have a favorite slogan, it would probably be “Playing It Safe.” Your ego operates in the emotional comfort zone of your mind and will do anything in its power to keep you there.  It is that little voice in the back of your head giving you all the reasons why you shouldn’t do this or try that …

The only way to create results in your life is by taking action. Realize that, succeed or fail, you will produce results from which you will learn.

Don’t be afraid of failure; be afraid of not taking action!

Question # 10: "How am I spending my time?"

It’s that time of year when many of us formulate our resolutions for the coming year. Whether it is getting in shape, reducing debt, finding a better job, finding our soul mate, we all vow to become and do better in the future. 

But how come so many of us fail to keep our well-intended New Year’s resolutions?

Most goal setting seminars teach you that the first thing you have to do is become absolutely clear about what it is you want, create a plan and work the plan. While these are important steps moving forward, why is it that within 30 days, most resolutions will be no more than a vague memory?

We get discouraged when results don’t come quickly enough or we find that we are not necessarily happier because of them. The main reason however is because we do not fully understand ourselves and we haven’t learned how to manage ourselves more effectively.

Before setting any personal, business or career goals, it’s important to get a better understanding of yourself, because unless you take control of all the stuff inside of you that is running your life, nothing you do or say on January 1st will help you get or achieve what you really want.

When you look at your life - from the inside out - as something you are creating, rather than having external circumstances or others create it for you, you can take full responsibility for your own life's experiences.

In order to follow through and successfully achieve your New Years resolutions, your goals must be aligned or congruent with your core values and beliefs; the stuff that matters most in your life. Without these things, you would not be the person you are today.

Values are basically ideals and principles that are important to you. They are usually expressed in abstract terms such as respect, freedom, love, justice, health, integrity, success and so forth. Beliefs on the other hand are essentially assumptions, agreements or judgments you have made (mostly subconsciously) about yourself, others and the world you live in. Limiting beliefs will hold you back, while empowering or positive beliefs move you forward. Often your values and beliefs are so much a part of who you are that they become invisible to you and difficult to identify.

Values and beliefs provide the foundation upon which your level of personal commitment, motivation perseverance and courage is built. If you build your goals or New Years resolutions upon a weak foundation, or you have cracks in the foundation, such as conflicting values or limiting beliefs, it will be difficult to overcome challenges and personal setbacks in pursuit of your goals.

Ultimately, the successful achievement of your goals will be a tangible expression of your core values and beliefs. 

At a deeper level, what you value the most and believe gives you a sense of who you are – a sense of self worth. It is from this unique point of self reference that you see and perceive the world around you. Most people live their lives consistent with their self image and will do almost anything to operate within the boundaries they have created. 

Every positive act of change in your life is fostered by a change in self-perception. This means that what is standing between you and your goals and dreams, are not circumstances – like the state of the economy – but the assumptions you have made about yourself.

Know Thyself!

Whether you want to lose weight, get out of debt, improve your sales, get organized, enjoy life more, spend more quality time with your family, start a business, or build a new career, identifying and clarifying your core values and inner beliefs is an important and necessary step toward personal achievement, fulfillment and success.

For more information on how to easily identify and strengthen your core beliefs and values, set and follow through on your 2009 resolutions, contact me or schedule an introduction life coaching session today.

"Each decision we make, each action we take, is born out of an intention."
(Sharon Salzberg)

With the New Year getting closer, what choices will you make that will affect the direction of your life? In which area(s) of your life did you experience the most challenge in the past year? -relationships, money, health, personal growth or your career? 

Whatever you believe was missing in 2008, it is yours, waiting to be claimed in 2009!

The first step is to make a conscious choice about the things you would like to attract, create or change and the things you would like to let go off.  Consider all of your relationships, ways of being, beliefs, goals, attitudes, behaviors, perceptions, habits, and even material things. Identify the things in your life that are draining you, as well as the things that are nourishing you.

When we don't challenge ourselves to create or to grow, we get stuck in the present and feel anxious about the future. When we don't make a conscious choice, the past creates the future. That is also a choice!

When you set goals for 2009, the choice of intention is the most fundamental choice you will make. The experiences you attract into your life are determined more by your intentions than your actions.

One person may donate money to a foundation in order to obtain a tax deduction, while another may do so to further help the cause of that foundation. Their actions are the same, while their intentions are quite different.

Let's assume that your goal is to change careers. Possible intentions for this goal could be to make more money, to feel less stress, to make more time for your family or to use more of your creative talents.

It is the conscious decision of your intention that will determine the experiences you have, the results you create and the people you attract into your life. When your intentions are aligned with your core values and principles, you will experience more joy, success, balance and fulfillment in pursuit of your goals!

Take some time to reflect on the outcomes you would like to create for this upcoming year and feel what your real intention is for each of them.

Setting your intent is about directing your focus in the present moment toward a future outcome. Because of the constantly changing environment of your life, setting your intent is an ever renewing process.

Set your intentions deliberately and carefully! To your success in 2009!

The word 'intent' comes from the Latin 'intendere', which means to “stretch forward.” When you set your intent, you are opening the doors to create the kinds of life experiences that you want to have.

Setting your intent is about directing your focus in the present moment toward a future outcome. Because of the constantly changing environment of your life, setting your intent is an ever renewing process.

Your intentions are thoughts, and your thoughts are energy. The nature of your intentions will determine specifically how you experience your own reality. As such, your intention is like a filter for your experiences.

Setting your intention is quite different from establishing goals or objectives. It should precede any form of goal setting activity. Goal setting is your ability to act upon your intention. When you are clear about your true intention, you will automatically guide your attention toward those experiences that you choose to manifest in your life.

Let’s say for example that you are going to attend an important networking event and your intent is to have fun and connect with people, you will then naturally attract these kinds of experiences.

Setting your intention is making a conscious and committed decision to attract certain experiences and outcomes in your life, even when you are not sure how or when these will manifest in your life.

All too often we get so obsessed in reaching a certain goal or expecting an outcome to manifest a certain way, that we miss out on opportunities presented to us – right here, right now – and fail to notice the synchronicities and new resources along the way.

Imagine traveling to a certain destination, and because you’re going too fast, you not only miss the beautiful scenery along the way, but you also miss a sense of where you are now and why you are going to your destination in the first place.

Integrity means that you do what you say you will do, and authenticity means that you mean what you say. When you are grounded in intention, you establish high integrity and authenticity in your life.

When your thoughts and intention are conflicted you will have conflicted experiences, because your outer world is a reflection of your inner world.

Setting intent is a powerful tool in creating the life you choose. You can set your intent before important meetings, or simply state your intent before you start your day.

What is it that you intend or wish for? What kind of experiences would you like to manifest?
Some examples of intent could be to have fun, to connect with people, to learn, to explore, to be caring, to be healthy, to help others, to heal yourself, to grow, …